THUNAI“After nourishment, shelter and companionship, stories are the thing we need most in the world.” ― Philip Pullman (author).
What is healing? When we are physically wounded, we use medicines and dress the wound to let it heal. The wound heals in time and leaves a scar, reminiscent of the hurt that once existed.
Experiences that are emotionally devastating and painful often leave imprints of hurt, trauma, depression, emotional pain or a feeling of being broken. Healing from it may involve using therapeutic processes that brings awareness, a helpful reframing of events that is empowering.
Obviously this needs to be done skillfully. Otherwise, there is risk of re-traumatisation. This is what happens when curious friends/relatives keep asking for details of what happened.
By revisiting the memory of the event skillfully, itself, or by recognizing and talking about the various coping mechanisms, the individual is given a direction to bring in awareness and eventually heal oneself.
To compose and/or tell a story is an assertion of self. To tell a story is to assign meaning to experience, because part of storytelling is expressing how one feels and what one thinks about what occurred in the story.
Why (re)telling a story is therapeutic?
Any form of expression for therapy, essentially involves telling the story. What happened? What did one go through as it happened? When did it take place? What was the impact?... These are some of the essential information an individual may share as narration of their life’s story or as they revisit the experience.
When the events in life happen or a traumatic experience occurs, the individual may not have been in control of the situation or of themselves. However, when the same events or experiences are related to a therapist or counsellor, with help, the individual feels much in control of their feelings and reactions and he / she is able to get a pragmatic view of the experience. This is the potential start of the healing process.
How can the story help?
It is possible for an individual to not know where to begin, or how to state into words the experience or the event itself. A counsellor / therapist works with the individual to give a subtle lead in the direction of putting things together, in sequence. Such that the individual is enabled to gather themselves and bring coherence in their narration.
Another way of practicing this is by asking the individual to tell a brief account of their life story. Then the client with the help of a therapist or guide marks the important turning points / characters / influences in the story.
They together create possible alterations or additions or deletions that the individual believes to be the best probability. Imagining and discussing all of this may give the individual feelings and realizations regarding ways to envision, and to live, the balance of his/her life.
When working with a story, including therapeutically, among the things one can do are
Think, feel, visualise, and imagine the story.
Write the story.
Draw the story.
Tell the story (as narrator, and as characters) -- to one or more other people.
Sing and Chant the story (using rhythmical, melodic, and other styles of speaking).
Move and Dance the story (using postures, gestures, rhythm, and various styles of
moving).
Discuss the story.
Often, we find some people who like to constantly narrate an experience, this may be for gratification or catharsis. But relaying it to someone else makes it easier for the bearer of the story to acknowledge it for themselves. This is not to be confused with being a nag or a drag. This is that individual’s outlet to heal and find closure.
When an individual tells the story he/she first has to first fully acknowledge the facts. This leads them into accepting it. Acceptance of the event as part of their lives and their life itself. In other words, it empowers the individual to unconditionally accept themselves, without judgement. Eventually the individual is able to accommodate with the fact or experience to heal and progress.
The entire journey of Acknowledgement—Acceptance—Accommodation is a personal process of self-healing.
Note: Narrative Exposure Therapy is a structured form of therapy that uses some of the story reconstruction techniques. It is particularly useful in collective settings (war, refuges etc). It is an APA recommended form of therapy for PTSD.