THUNAIKey Points:
Anger is a common emotion in individuals with PTSD, but is not a bad emotion in itself.
Anger arises from a loss of control, feeling of being violated.
Constructive Anger is healing, and can be used to regain control of a situation and maintain self-respect.
Destructive anger is harmful, especially in the long term but can be managed with various strategies.
The Functions of Anger:
Emotions are essentially our body's way of communicating with us. Anger is an emotion that is often about control. It's often our body's way of telling us that we feel like things are out of our control or that we have been violated in some way.
Anger can motivate us to try to establish or reestablish control (or at least a sense of control) over a situation. The extreme fluctuations of internal experience that occur in PTSD (for example, constantly shifting between emotional numbing and intense anxiety) can also make you experience your inner life as chaotic and out of control, and that there is no escape. These feelings, in turn, can cause anger.
Unfortunately, in a hierarchical society such as ours, anger can give us a false sense of power by making others listen to us or do things for us. But this does not work long term.
“ Anger is a valid emotional experience that can provide you with important information about yourself, your environment, and how you relate to others.”
Constructive Anger:
In her book Seeking Safety, Dr. Lisa Najavits describes constructive anger as anger that can be healing. Constructive anger is something that can be explored or examined to help you better understand your situation, other people, and yourself. Further, for anger to be constructive and manageable, a person must also be aware of it, recognize their own needs and the needs of others. Here, your anger is being used to take control of the situation and maintain your self-respect.
Think about the last time you were angry and try to see if it was constructive in the above manner?
Destructive Anger:
Destructive anger is expressed in an unhealthy way and causes harm (for example, acting out aggressively by verbally or physically hurting someone). It may be disproportionate to the provocation (we become “headless”).
The anger might also be turned inward, resulting in deliberate self-harm or substance use. It works in the short-term as it releases tension, but can have long-term negative consequences.
Destructive anger tends to be frequent and strong. In survivors, these feelings can be even more intense. Sometimes, a person may be unaware of their anger or, if they are aware, they may try to suppress or avoid it.
“ when anger is not attended to, it usually will only get stronger. As the emotion grows, the likelihood that it will be expressed in an unhealthy, potentially harmful way increases.”
Managing Your Anger:
Anger can be a difficult emotion to manage, especially if you have a past history of trauma. However, if you listen to your anger and attempt to connect with the information that it is giving you, it will help you learn to better respond to your environment. Understanding why anger is present often makes it feel less chaotic and unpredictable.
What was my trigger to get angry?
Is there anything from the past that influenced it? Did I feel ignored because my dad used to ignore me always? Did I feel threatened because this situation led to some danger?
There are healthy ways of managing anger and any other intense emotion you might feel overwhelmed by. For example, self-soothing skills, taking a time-out, seeking out social support, or emotion regulation strategies.
“The more you approach your anger, listen to it, and respond to it in a healthy way, the more your tolerance for anger will increase, and the long-term negative consequences of not dealing with anger will decrease.”
Based on an article from VerywellMind