When we are caught in a loop of negative thoughts, we start to feel bad emotions like guilt, shame, or even feelings of worthlessness. And when we feel this way, it shows in our behaviors. For example, we might start to spend too much time watching TV, or staying indoors, or avoiding our responsibilities.
However, all of these responses have a consequence - whether it was intended or not, and can impact both ourselves, and the people around us. Understanding this can help us modify our behaviours.
Even pretending nothing is happening, not responding, or running away, is a choice which has consequences. Withdrawing to think or regroup is also a valid choice and can be both safe and useful.
Look: What’s going on? What’s happening? What’s happening inside you? What are your responses? What are the circumstances? Describe the context: What are your thoughts ? How long did you mull over the event afterwards?
Think: How do I feel about that? What’s the main problem? Why is this happening? What was the trigger or cause (e.g. attitudes, beliefs, past experiences)? What are the consequences? How am I behaving (e.g. are my responses defensive, grounded in my past)? Which area/s can I move forward with? How might my moving forward look? When should I begin – what order...? How should I do it?
Act: By ‘Act’ we mean to take action, or do something. A good place to start is to think about what could/should be done differently to get the desired outcome. Then begin to action the smallest and most easily managed act that would have the most benefit.
Excerpted from an article by Blueknot.